KristyWes

Hello, my name is Kristy. I procrastinate.

I've decided to go home for the weekend, so I bought me a ticket for the 9am bus out of here. It is a few minutes after midnight, and you can rest assured, I am not packing. Clearly you can see that I am instead "blogging" as they say.

Some of you may be thinking, "Kristy, it is a few minutes after midnight. Why don't you pack and go to bed?" To which I reply, "You don't know me at all!" This is what I do: ritualized not-packing. I may be up, not packing, until 4 or 5am. I'm that good at it. It's where I shine.

Not-packing involves an intense combination of wandering to and fro, emailing, making coffee, drinking coffee, burning cd's for friends, organizing old utility bills, hating all my clothes, making a list of things I could pack, checking the weather report, deciding to watch an episode of Friends on TV while I pack, watching an episode of Friends while not packing, deciding whether or not the trip will necessitate me bringing a bandana (the answer is always "yes, just in case"), plus a whole host of other activities, none of which involve placing items into a suitcase.

Tonight I will be attempting the triple-axle of not-packing: Yes, friends, I will be doing my taxes. This not-packing ritual has intensified over the years, and I'm not sure why. What is causing this mental block that prevents me from behaving like a normal person on the eve of travel? I think I should spend the next few hours psycho-analyzing myself to get at the root of the issue.

Reach out touch faith

One of my favorite games is the Inappropriate Game. It requires no equipment and can be played any time, any place. It goes something like this: you try to figure out what would be the most inappropriate ___________ to do ____________. Example: What would be the most inappropriate song for a bride to walk down the aisle to? Possible Answer: Mu-zac version of "It's Raining Men."

Some friends and I particularly enjoy the genre of "Inappropriate offertories." What would be the most inappropriate song to sing for an offertory at church? Some suggestions have been "Like a Prayer" (Madonna), "Moment Like This" (Kelly Clarkson), "Faith" (George Michael), etc.

Tonight at the Maundy Thursday service I attended, the offertory was actually "Personal Jesus" by DepecheMode. At first, I was reminded of the inappropriate Game, but after listening to the lyrics, I think it rather worked quite well.

I'm amused by the imagined scene of two little old blue-haired ladies sitting together in a church. It's time for the offertory, and as the ushers start to pass the plates, Pearl turns to Eugenia and whispers, "Genie, isn't that DepecheMode they're playing?"